Disappointment? or God’s Appointment!

 Remember me? 2012 has put me on quite a journey! I am so excited to share with you the many ways God continues to use my experience.  Today, being January 1st, I have the perfect story to share…
  As you may recall, about mid-way through 2012, I began volunteering at The Pregnancy Resource Center. Well, recently, they have changed their name to Open Arms Pregnancy open armsCenter and have moved from North Hills to Northridge.  The week of their move I received an e-mail informing me that instead of seeing clients this week, they are asking if volunteers would come into the new building to help clean.
  Initially, I was excited about helping Open Arms in whatever way I could with their new transition.  When the day of my volunteering came, I packed up some cleaning supplies (from under my dished filled sink) and headed out the door.  I decided not to tell Jon what I was doing, given the current condition of our own home. 😉
   As I drove, I noticed a little seed of doubt lined with bitterness beginning to form within me. Why would I possibly go help someone else clean, when I have cleaning of my own to catch up on? …The fact that I feel the need to hide this from my husband, tells me that I should perhaps not be doing this….There are actually people out there who have “The Gift of Cleaning”, God is fully aware that I am not one of them… Yeah, this is not what I signed up for!
     In the background of this growing seed, I could hear the CD I had left playing in my car. It was the voice of the Teaching Director from a Genesis study, I take on Tuesday mornings.  She was talking about Creation and how nothing God creates is an accident…  My mind then turned to the unborn who (much like my own lost little one) have a purpose and a divine creator. My little seed of doubt soon became dormant… but unfortunately, not for long.
   Walking into the new office, fresh paint filled my nostrils as I extended a hug to the Director of Open Arms. “I’m so glad you could come”, she said, and with that, I wondered what important task awaited me. “If you could fill your bucket with soap and water, I’ll have you start by washing the walls in the bathroom.”
   cleaning_bucket_sponge_water_clip_art_hightHer words were like Miracle Grow to my once dormant seed. But, being a first-born, the desire to please others always puts me on auto-pilot. So, here I stand on a step stool, dipping my rag into the clean soapy water. Stretching my Open Arms, I am able to reach into places where dust had accumulated and perhaps had never felt the touch of such simple cleaning power.
   I then became aware that this is the very room these women will see the results of their pregnancy tests and their lives will change. Despite whether it’s a “+” experience or a “” experience; they will leave this room with a  whole new view than the one they walked in with.
  As I continued to wash, I began to pray that God would wash over each woman’s heart.  That she would use this moment to draw closer to Him, to view life as a gift of great value. That she remembers that the same God that created her, has created the life that she holds within. I pray she will learn that there is someone who loves her unconditionally and is much bigger than whatever her circumstances are.
   I suddenly felt the beating of my own heart, I swallowed hard to fight back a quickly forming tear. I realized that God had not put me here on accident. It wasn’t my cleaning skills that he desired, it was my ability to see beyond the dusty walls. He needed someone interceding for these scared and confused ladies. He needed me!
    For the next 2 hours I stayed at Open Arms and proceeded to do various cleaning tasks with the happiest of hearts. I even had time to go home before picking up carpool, to tend to my own dish filled sink. 🙂
     I know 2013 is just underway, but it won’t be long before disappointments and seeds of doubt begin to sprout. How you choose to view these disappointments may determine how Happy your New Year will actually be.  So, Happy New Year to you… and to all the “appointments” that are on their way.

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5 Responses to Disappointment? or God’s Appointment!

  1. I love your blog, Kim! I’ve come to realize that my attitude towards whatever it is I am doing is what determines if I have a positive or negative experience. Thank you for reminding me to start my new year with a positive perspective on life!

  2. Krissia says:

    May God abundantly bless you for your open heart to serve him. I’ve been greatly blessed by your blogs, keep up the faith.

  3. Debi Harvey says:

    You inspire me, Kim, by the way you allow God to change your heart. You take each experience and look for the lesson and then you apply it and share it. Thank you for this wonderful blog!

  4. Hi there, You have done an excellent job. I will certainly digg it and personally suggest to my friends. I’m sure they’ll be benefited from this site.

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